Palin Leaving To Become Reality Television Star

In a move that surprised the heck out of a lot of people, Alaskan governor (and favorite late night talk show host punching bag) Sarah Palin has announced her resignation, effective July 26, of the office she has held for barely one term. This has caused some speculation, you betcha, of Palin's future plans, and how quitting the job she was elected to complete will hurt her chances in 2012.
The Insurgency has learned that far from retreating from the national spotlight, Palin will court it in her new position as reality television star. She has already signed on to appear as a contestant on Donald Trump's Celebrity Apprentice, as well as next summer's I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here!. She is also in the negotiation process for Real Housewives of Wasilla, a fill-in for Elizabeth Hasselback on The View, and her own show on the Fox News network where she will offer parenting tips, light news, and cooking segments on how to prepare moose, polar bear, and other delicacies of the northern country.
A spokesperson for the soon-to-be-former governor said that "Gov. Palin was tired of being 'out of the action' up in Alaska, She obviously feels her chances are better on television, where she can get the exposure, and paychecks, that will enable her to secure her party's nomination in the presidential election. Her slogan will be 'America Needs A Dose of Reality', and what better way to get that cred than becoming America's pre-eminent reality star?"